Darkness in My heart.

Ah.. I have to admit, I am damned spoiled. :/
Spoiled bitch that I am, I hate being left out, but I mean who doesn't? But I am worse. When I am left out, I let my emotions show it out.. which means, my temper will go bad on whoever left me out. :/

I hate being left out and ignore. I dont care if I am not in your center of attention, I just want to let people know that I exist. You know, the feeling of not existing? I know I am a fucking spoiled woman. But who will be able to understand and accept this darkness in my heart?

Not like I want them to do that. I just like to show my emotions.

For example today, I told my friends, I did not want to go play badminton (I have been letting it off for 2 weeks and not going), no one cares. Well, I hate that. :/ Not that they have to of course, I just don't like it. Actually, I fucking hate it.

I dont mind that they went out, then have dinner and came back. But the fact that it took them so long to finish their stuff kinda irritates me. I hate it. I wan to say I hate them so much for it. I want to lock them out so they can't get into the house, and they will have to stay outside.

It's just my fucking attitude problem and no one will care. I do not know why am I still acting up. :/

Ahh.. I need to go church tomorrow to see what 'God' has anything to say to me. :/